Selene's Dairy
by MageRilyn
Summary: 1 year I have been a vampire. 52 weeks I have killed. 365 days I have wished I was human. I pulled out my dairy, which was my only link to realty, and began to write... I can't do summaries but give it a chance! so pls R&R...
1. Chapter 1

1-2-10

Happy Birthday! Today I am 1 year old. For a vampire. In 5 months I will be 16 in human years, but I doubt I'm going to have a Sweet 16. I'm not having any party, actually.

I'd give anything to be human again. Anything to be what was. But that won't happen, it would have a long time ago if it was happening.

I wonder if they really exist, the Cullens that is. Yes, I'm still trying to find them. I hope they're still there. What if they're not? What if I don't find them? And worse, what if they turn me away? They won't, I think, from what I heard they are extremely nice. That's why I need to find them:

I hate being so alone and,…

I have never killed before now and I want to stop killing.

All I know about them is that they have a way to stop killing, and live around the Olympic Mountains, so I'll go there and see what I can find…

1-4-10

I guess being a vampire has its perks, I started in New Mexico and now I'm in Seattle, Washington.

Now all there's left to do is find the Cullens, sounds easy, huh. Yeah… right. Maybe I'll find them tomorrow that give me enough time to work on my story. I now lying is bad but I can't tell them my real story! I can't even bring myself to think about it, best to forget it.


	2. Chapter 2

1-4-10

I stood in the woods near their home. I had almost everything worked out, I was going to walk up to the front door and knock, the only thing left to do is gather up the courage.

"You know, your not going to get anything done if you just stand there." I jumped about a foot in the air. Walking toward me was a tiny, pixie-like girl with black spiky hair going around her head in a halo. "You must be Selene! I've been waiting and waiting for you, was starting to think you wouldn't come after all." She beamed. "But you're here now and that's what matters. Better late then never."

"Uh... alright?" Amazing how calm I sounded.

"Well, come on! Its time to introduce you to everyone else! By the way, I'm Alice." Alice took my hand and pretty much dragged me to the mansion.

_Is this girl crazy or something? I'm a stranger to her. WAIT! How did she know my NAME? _I thought_. What is up with her?_

Alice opened the door and lead me into a large white-ish living room. It was very bright, and very open. This must have originally been several rooms, but walls had been removed from most of the first floor to create one wide space. The back, south-facing wall had been entirely replaced with glass, and, beyond the shade of the ceders, the lawn stretched bare to the wide river. A massive curving staircase dominate the west side of the room. The walls, the high-beamed ceiling, the wooden floors, and the thick carpets were all varying shades of white. Standing just to the left of the door, on a raised portion of the floor, was a spectacular grand piano.

I remembered I used to play some paino, my mom who was also my teacher thought I would grow up to be a very skilled pianist. But of course I could never grow up now, and that dream died.

"Everyone!" Alice said. "She's here. Come on down and meet her!" I looked away from the piano to see a young man, probably in his 20s, and a Doctor by his name tag which said Dr. Cullen. He had blond hair and was handsomer than any movie star I have ever seen. Of course I already new that, all vampires looked perfect, and he had the normal traits like pale skin and dark circles under eyes. If you seen one once you've seen them all. The only thing different was his eyes which weren't red or even black, they were gold. At his side was a woman with the same pale, beautiful features as the rest of us. She had billows of soft, caramel-colored hair, she was small, slender, yet less angular, more rounded than others. Something about her also reminded me of a mother.

"Selene, meet Carlisle and Esme." Alice had moved away from me to stand next to a lean, honey-blond haired boy. Something about him made me want to turn and run away but I sucked it up and stayed, and then I felt much calmer and happy. Weird... just one second ago I wanted to fly out the door and get as far away from them as possible and now it was like I had no chose but to be happy. What was going on?

"This is Jasper." Alice said dreamily. She looked at Jasper. "See, I told you she would be fine."

"Yes, you did. But I am still not completely convinced." He said.

Alice signed. "You're so paranoid."

"Ah, so the newborn decided to come after all." A huge, bulky- like a serious weight lefter- man entered the room. "I was beginning to think she'll never come."

_And I was beginning to think things couldn't get weirder, but look a talking bear just came in. _I thought_. And I am not a newborn if I've been like this for a year, right?_

"Sorry, I didn't think I was expected." I whispered. Another one came and... made me take back what I wrote about 'if you seen one once you've seen them all' because if you still think you are the most beautiful thing on earth, no matter what you are, you have not seen her yet. No offence. She had a beautiful figure, the kind that made ever girl around her take a hit on her self-esteem, which was exactly what I was doing. Her hair was golden, gently waving to the middle of her back.

"You were." She said. "But only because Alice saw you coming. It's not your fault your late."

I stared at Alice. "What do you mean, saw me coming?"

"Where are the others? They are suppose to be here." Alice asked.

"Nessie was falling asleep so they took her back to the cottage. Selene will meet them in the mourning." Esme said. "Selene, this is Rosalie and Emmett."

"And your suppose to meet Edward, Bella, and Nessie, but they are not here so you'll meet them later." Alice said. "And as for me knowing you were coming, I can see the future and saw that you were looking for us." She grinned. Well actually she was always smiling so when she says something imagine her smiling when she says it. Anyway, she walked-more like dance- back over to me and took my hand. "And you are most definitely welcome here, right?" She looked at Carlisle who nodded his approval. "And since Edward and Bella moved out you could have Edward's room." She lead me up the stair case all the way to the 3rd floor and down the hall to the last door. "Your room." She whispered and pulled me in.

The room faced south, with a wall-sized window like the great room below. The whole back side of the house must be glass. The view looked down on the winding Sol Duc River, across the untouched forest to the Olympic Mount. range. They were much closer than I would have thought. The room was bare expect for an inviting black leather sofa. The floor was covered with a thick golden carpet. and the walls were hung with heavy fabric in a slightly darker shade.

"Good acoustics." I said.

"Yes, Edward is the musical one in the family. We had everything moved when you were coming. Its get to have you here, Sel." Alice explained.

I tensed. Sel was what everyone use to call me. Now I hated that nickname. But I forced myself to relaxe and smiled. "Thank you." _For more then you know._

"If you need anything just ask." Alice turned and walked out, leaving me all alone. So I made myself comfy on the couch and pulled out my journal....

* * *

I closed the small notebook and slipped it back into my bag. I could almost here them in the living room talking about me, but wasn't trying to listen to what they said. So they had a psychic. Well, that saved alot of explaining. And I'd have to meet three more of them in the mourning... and one of them slept, so that must mean she was human! I may not be new but I can't be near a HUMAN! What are they thinking?

I looked out the window at the moon that was sinking below the horizin. _I guess I'll find out soon..._


	3. MUST READ

_**READ READ READ!**_

To All Readers:

I will not continu my story until I have at least 10 reviews. Reviews really help a writer know if what she/he is writing is good and helps figure out if the diration she/he is going is what the readers like.

Plus I will be gone for a week so I can't do anything.

**Please Review! **

**~ LS7**


	4. Chapter 4

1-5-10

I guess things aren't always what they seem, but let me explain what happened...

* * *

A few hours later, I heard the door downstairs open. Some more talking went on and I heard my name come up a few times. Finally, Alice come up.

"Hey, Selene. There's some more of us you need to meet." I got up and followed her. "I know you're worried about Nessie. Don't be afraid. Ness is not like other people."

"What?" I asked.

"You'll see." She said in her sing-song voice.

We were at the top of the last stair way now, and I took in the scene. Everyone from last night was there including three more new faces. One was a boy around my age. He wasn't as muscular as the other males but he was a bit better looking, he had bronze hair and his arm was around the waist of another girl with brown hair. Standing a little behind them was a small girl-couldn't be more then 10-with perfectly curled bronze hair the same color as the boy's. But her eyes. I was use to red eyes, and the black eyes when one was hunger. These vampires' eyes were gold, and though it was weird, I was sure I would get use to it. This little girl's eyes were brown, like chocolate. A human color.

I tensed, waiting for the blood lust to take control and make me insane. I don't remember when the last time a hunted was, but I knew it was long enough to make me attack the first time I smell blood.

My thoart burned at the thought. _Darn it! STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT!_

Alice took my hand and said, "It's okay. Nessie isn't like other people. She's half-human half-vampire."

"What?" _Was that even possible? To be half-human half-vampire? _

I looked back at the girl and saw somethings about her. Like how she had the same perfect features of a vampire. A little pink in her cheeks. Heat radiated from the girl at in inhuman temperature. And there was a heart beating as fast as a humming birds wings.

"Yep, I'm a half-vampire," She explained as her, She pointed to the couple infront of her. "And these two are my biological parents." She laughed at my confused expression.

"Oh." I manged. I took a breath and in hauled an odd scent. It smelled like the combination of the most beautiful perfume and the scent of the most delicious food. There was enough of the sweet vampire smell to keep the human part from being overwhelming. "I didn't think that was possible." But I was only a year old. There was still stuff I didn't know about this world.

The bunnette laughed softly, too. "Neither did we."

"Sel,"- I mentally flinched, I hated that nickname-"this is Edward, Bella, and Renesmee."

"Nessie for short." Nessie said.

"Alice, I don't think she likes her nickname, she wants you to stop calling her that." Edward said.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Selene. You should have told me."

"How did you know that?" I asked Edward. Was he a physic, too?

"No, I'm not like Alice, I can read minds."

_Well, this won't be as easy as hoped. Now there's a mind-reader to worry about?_ I thought. _Wait! He probably heard that. Stop thinking._

"Anything else I should know?" I asked as calmly as I could.

"Well, Edward can't read my mind because I have a mental shield." Bella said. I nodded. I knew what a shield was, _he _told me about one in Italy long ago.

"And I can control emotions. That's why you feel so calm and relaxed." Jasper added.

"Wow." I hadn't developed any sort of ability that I knew of. I probably won't.

"Now, you need to come with me." Alice said. "Jasper and I are going to show you how to hunt like a vegan. Come on." She took my hand and pulled me to the door. "After we can go shopping. Your outfit is _killing_ me."

Jasper followed us out, while everyone else murmured 'good luck' to me.

We ran into the woods and when we were deep in we stopped.

"Okay," Alice said. "Hunting is pretty easy. Like instinct. Did you smell that?"

"Yes. It smells like elk. Are we hunting that?"

"'Ope, you are. We are just going to help you."

"Make sure I don't... hurt someone, you mean."

"I mean, what I said. Now, come on, before the elk move on."

"Yes, don't want that to happen." Jasper said. I had almost forgotten he was there.

"Let's go." I sighed. _Here goes nothing. _

I was able to take the biggest one down and drain it without getting to messy. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And when I was done I felt very full. _It will be okay. I would get use to this._

When we were back at the house, Alice dragged me to the garage and, ignoring my struggles and protest, forced me into the yellow porche.

"Alice, I'm not really much of a shopper." My last attempted at changing her mind was a failure.

"You are with me." I sighed with defeat. I did need some new clothes.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Seattle."

"I hate long car rides." I groaned.

"Lucky for you, this isn't a long drive." Alice floured it and we were off.

If I were still human I would have been terrified of the speed we were going, but I wasn't human and I wasn't afraid. I kinda liked it. And we made it to the mall in no time.

"Come on, first we'll get you some sunglasses." After that we went on to exploring the mall. Oddly it was fun. Alice my have picked some girly things but she always picked something I liked. Alice and I were there for hours.

"Please try it on." Alice begged.

"I'm not going to prom."

"But it's so pretty. I know you'll love it."

"I doubt that." The dress she was trying to get me was a deep red without straps and a sort of ballroom feel to it **(a/n: link to dress on my profile)**.

"Please try it on. Pllleeeaaassse."

I groaned. "Fine." I took the dress and went into a dressing room. I pulled on the dress and turned to the mirror.

I gasped when I saw how I looked. Vampire's are always beautiful, when I became a vampire and saw my refection for the I thought I was gorgeous, but all of that faded away. Now it was back again, that feeling. With my long dark red hair, a shade lighter then the dress, my snow fair skin, even my awful red eyes were radiant.

I could never be anywhere close to Rose's beauty, but I looked like a godess.

"Selene, are you alright?" Alice called.

"Perfectly fine." I whispered.

"Then let me see." I opened the door and stepped out. She gasped. "Even lovelier then my vision." Was all she said.

She bought the dress, and we went on to the rest of the mall until it closed and we had more then our fill of closes and stuff.

The drive home was quite and when the car stopped in the garage I said, "Thank you for making my try on the dress."

"I know you would love it."

"I know. Thanks for the shopping trip." I went up stairs juggling my clothes and hung them up in the large closest.

Now, here I am. Writing in my diary. I better go and get use to this family.

* * *

**Sorry it took so long. Hope this holds you up. REVEIW!**

**LS7**


	5. Chapter 5

1-7-10

I found out that I have one more person to meet. He's not a vampire or like Nessie. Or human. I don't know what to expect, but I'll tell you when I find out.

* * *

I closed my little green book, and headed downstairs to meet the whoever-it-is.

I found everyone in the Family room. Alice was lounging on the bottom step of the staircase with Jasper's head in her lap; Carlisle had his head bent over a fat book in his lap; Esme was humming to herself, sketching on notepad, while Rosalie and Emmett laid out the foundation for a monumental house of cards under the stairs; Bella and Nessie were reading a poetry book to themselves; Edward was at the piano and playing very softly a beautiful piece I had never heard before. It was obvious that even if I practiced the piano every hour of every day for a life-time I would never be as good as him.

"You play?" he asked.

"A little. I'm not very good." I hastily. I didn't want to be called to play after someone as good as him. Of course, he read that thought in my mind, but he didn't press the matter. "What were you playing? An original?"

"Yes, it's a something I wrote for Bella when I meet her." He explained. I noticed Bella had gotten up and was sitting next to him on the bench her head resting on his shoulder.

Before she could say something I imagine old be very romantic and corny, I heard a motorcycle coming and smelled a stink that made me winkle my nose. "Ugh, what is that odor?" I gasped.

"That is the _mutt_." Roselia said.

Just than, a tall Indian boy walked in and without a word to us, walked straight to Nessie. "Jakey!" she squealed with joy. She jumped into his waiting arms. He looked at her as if he were a blind man seeing the sun for the first time. Nessie touched his cheek, what I thought was a loving jester turned out to be something else.

A look of shock crossed his face, and he turned and looked at me. "Who is she?" He asked in a husky voice.

"I'm Selene," I answered.

"She's the one from Alice's vision," Bella explained.

"Oh," 'Jakey' said, he regarded me suspiciously.

"Selene, this is a close family friend of mine, Jacob Black," Bella went on. She whispered, "He smells because he's a werewolf."

"A werewolf?"

"Actually, a shape-shifter, but werewolf is easier to remember, sense we always thought I was that." Jacob said.

"Oh."

"I've missed you!" Nessie said, effectively getting his attention, again. They sat on the couch chatting about what has happened the last few days.

I looked at Bella questioningly. "They act like they're in love but she's ten and he's, like, sixteen."

"She's two years old, honestly, but she grows very fast, and she will stop growing five years."

"Okay, but still..."

"Jake imprinted on her. He has no choice but to love Nessie."

"Huh?" I asked.

"When a werewolf sees the person he is destined for, he imprints. Jacob imprinted on Nessie," Edward explained.

"Like, love at first sight?"

"Similar," Edward said.

That's romantic. For the whole day I got to know Jacob a little better, and saw that his eyes never trailed for from Nessie. And in his eyes I saw real love. I've pretty much never seen anyone look me like that.

* * *

**Hope this holds you up. REVIEW! And Please tell me if I'm getting to corny with this. PLEASE!  
**

**LS7**


	6. Chapter 6

1-15-10

I have been here a week. So far so good. The vegan lifestyle is apparently going "far better then expected" but they still don't trust me to go to school, which is just fine! I always liked having the house to myself, except Esme. It was fun getting to know her. She's just like the mom I always wanted. Nessie stays home too. Since she grows so fast, they think they should leave her home until she stops growing. She's so cute and sweet. I love her.

And Alice is fun too. I kinda like having her do makeovers on me. I like what I look like at the end. Bella's relieved that Alice has someone else to play, "Barbie" with. When I was human, I usually wasn't into that stuff. Mainly I just hate how long it took and how painful it was. Now I don't have to worry about one of those two.

Rosalie is nice to me. I like her well enough, and she understands what it's like to have everything, then lose it. But talking to her about it just makes me depressed. I thought I came here to find a way _not _to be depressed.

The guys pretty much keep to themselves or their mates. Except Emmett, who seems intent on irritating me. He reminds me of my brother. So I can't help but like him.

The other day, I met some werewolves from Jacob's pack. Embry, Quil, Leah, and Seth. So far I like Seth the most and Leah the least.

But I'm by myself now. Everyone is at school or work, Esme and Nessie went to the store. Gosh, those dogs, _so much!_ I decided to explore the woods. Get a better lay out of the land, hunt a little, you know. I'm also looking for a better hiding spot for my book and when I write. More then once I have caught Emmett trying to read my journal. I swear, if he does that one more time, I'll bite his head off!

It's a good thing I haven't wrote any secrets in here, yet. I haven't anything about my past-life or anything I don't want them to know about. I still hoping I'll forget. But for some reason, I can't. Even with how my memories are now, I can't forget. Why? Alex said...

It's getting late. Everyone should be home now. I better go too.

* * *

I closed the book and clasped. I took a deep breath. _Don't think of it, don't think of it._ When I calmed down enough, I stored my book in the the hollow of the tree I sat next to. I it was safe there, until I find someplace better to hide it. "Darn it, Emmett. Why can't he mind his own business?" I asked myself. I run back, pausing when I caught the smell of a cougar and hunted it down.

When I walked in the Cullens were huddled around the TV, they turned to me and I could tell something was up. "What is it?" I asked them. No one answered at first, but then Carlise asked, "Selene, what do you remember about your past?"

"Nothing." I lied. I couldn't tell them, even if I wanted to.

"Couldn't tell us what?" Edward questioned. Darn it, I hate mind reading!

"I'm sorry." I looked away, and me gaze found the piano.

Fame, music, those words my mother said to me so long ago came back. If Alex had never turned me, if he had never met me, i would be playing the piano right now, practicing, or writing music. None the wiser about this mythical world. _Stop thinking._ I warned.

"Why are you asking?" I asked before Edward could comment on my thoughts.

"We saw something on the News. A picture of a human girl that looked a lot like you." Emmett said. Gosh, hey was just like a walking talking bear! That's his new nickname, I decided.

"It was a missing person thing," Alice added.

"Oh," was all I could say. I took a deep breath. "Can I go to my room?"

"Of course, sweetie." Esme said. I sat down on the couch in my room and listened to what they were saying downstairs.

(a/n: to make this simple I'm just going to do this: Alice: * Jasper: $ Edward: ^ Bella: # Rosalie: Emmett: % Carlise: ( Esme: ) Selene's thoughts: **thought**.)

( Well?

^ Doesn't want us to know her past.

% Yeah, that's obvious. What was she thinking?

^ She was thinking about music. What her future would have been if she was never changed, and a vampire named Alex.

# Who's Alex?

^ The one who changed her.

Why can't we just leave her alone about this? If she doesn't want to tell us, it isn't your business.

) Yes, and she is very distressed about this.

$ Alice, what do you see.

* She'll tell us the truth in time. We should let it rest... Wait, I see something else. Selene's alone. No, she's talking to someone. I can't see who, but she doesn't like him. Wait!... It disappeared.

# What do you mean, it disappeared?

* One minute it was there, and now it's gone. I can't see it anymore. I can't see_ her_ anymore.

**What?**

$ What do you mean you can't see her?

* I can see her some of her future, but nothing beyond a day or two, maybe a week.

^ I see what you mean.

( Has this ever happened before?

* Yes... But only when someone...

**Dies. Am I going to die?**

( We don't know what well happen. Alice, if you see something else, please tell us. She said Selene will tell us soon, let's leave this alone until then.

**Gladly. **

I heard everyone separate and Alice came up stairs to my room. "You were listening." Alice stated.

I nodded.

"You can tell us, you know. We won't judge you harshly."

"I just don't like talking about it."

"I understand." She began to walk out. _Now or never_.

"Alice?"

"Yes?"

"Am I going to die?"

She looked away. For once her cheerful attitude was gone.

"I am, aren't I?"

"I don't know." She turned and forced a smile. "The future isn't set in stone, and I've been wrong before." She walked out calling a happy "Good-night" to me. I just sat there. The only person I could think of that would kill me is Alex. But I lost him a long time ago. Would he track me down just to kill me?

* * *

**Ohhhh, who _is_ Alex? Will Selene die? Who ever guesses right well when this awesome imagery car, and be named somehow in my story. Hope this holds you up. REVIEW! And Please tell me if I'm getting to corny with this. PLEASE!  
**

**LS7**


	7. Chapter 7

Selene's Diary

2-10-10

Emmett came into my room, "Some of us are going hunting if you want to come."

"Okay," I answered, "You know, Emmett, you could knock before entering one's room."

"What fun would that be though?" He laughed and left.

I rolled my eyes and set down my book. I was feeling pretty thirsty, might as well go. I've been trying to avoid the family a little ever since that news story and Alice's vision. Their questioning stares were making me uncomfortable and I didn't want to seem scared or worried or anything. I tried to go on the way I would usually. And it would be usual for me to go hunt.

I walked down stairs and saw who was going. Bella was going as well as Edward and Nessie, which meant Jacob would be there, Emmett was going and Rosalie. "Okay, let's go." Rosalie said impatiently. I could see from her dark eyes she was hungry.

We all went out and ran into the forest. Jacob, in wolf form, caught up with us and when we separated out into little groups, he went with Nessie, Bella, and Edward. I followed Rosalie and Emmett for a while then followed the scent of a deer away from them.

The deer had traveled far and it took me a while to track it down. Good thing it was big, or would have been mad at how long it took me to find it. I also brought down the mountain lion that was going to kill the deer.

Feeling pretty full, I ran down to my newest hiding place for my dairy. I hadn't written in it in a while and I thought it would be nice to catch up. I reclined in the tree after retrieving it and wrote for a time.

I heard the sound of someone coming. I looked up, realizing that I had been for hours. The sun was now sinking in the west. The vampire (no human could move that quietly or quickly) had to be Emmett trying to get my dairy again. "Emmett, you should mind your on business and not read my dairy." I called annoyed.

"Still writing in that little book I see." A familiar voice said. Horrible familiar.

In a second I was standing against the tree I had been in. I scanned the shadows for him. "W-what do you want, Alex?" I called.

He appeared in front of me. Of course he still looked the same, tall, lean, raven-black hair, rose-red eyes, and white skin like snow. He leaned casually against a tree and smirked at me. "Hello, Sel, I've missed you," Alex said.

"I haven't," I said glaring at him.

Alex laughed lightly. "And you still hate me."

"That will never change."

"I know."

"What do you want?" I asked again.

"I think we should get going, before your new _family_ comes looking for you."

I shook my head. Alex rolled his eyes and walked toward me. "Come here now."

"No."

"Selene," He warned.

_Don't listen to him!_ I thought.

"Selene, come here, please," What Alex's voice sounded like is indescribable. It was like, I had no choice but to listen and obey. He was using his ability on me. It was like moving in a dream walking to him. _STOP! Run away!_ A part of me screamed, but it was drowned out by Alex's voice.

Alex touched my cheek, "Good girl." He grabbed a hand full of my hair and yanked my head back exposing my neck. "Now, if you cause me anymore trouble, I will rip you apart and burn you. Do you understand?"

_NO! Get away! Run!_ The voice inside me kept screaming. I tried to listen, but Alex was too strong. _Get away! DISAPPEAR!_ He let go and walked away. I didn't follow. I stood still. Alex realized I wasn't following and turned around, annoyed.

He looked right at me then shock crossed his face. He looked around the woods we were in. "Sel, where are you?"

_Right in front of you, dumbo_. I looked down at my hand and didn't see it. I looked down at the rest of my body but it wasn't there. _Where am I?_ I thought. I could feel hand there but I couldn't see it, like I was invisible. Invisible? INVISIBLE! I had the power of invisibility. Awesome. I backed away as slow as a human trying not to make a sound that would give me away. "Selene, Sel, can you please show yourself?"

And just like that I was visible again and under his spell. That's when the Cullens came.

Bella put her shield over me and I blinked like I just woke up.

Carlisle stepped forward with Edward next to him. "Hello, I am Carlisle, and this is my family. Is there something we can help you with?" He said casually.

"No, I'm just retrieving my lost newborn." Alex said just as casual.

"I believe it should be Selene's choice on if she wants to go with you or not." Edward said.

"Yes, I would agree, but, you see, it isn't a matter of choice. Selene belongs to me, I am her sire. So, I'll just be taking her, now. I'm sorry for any trouble we've caused you." Alex turned to me. "Selene, come. We are leaving."

I braced myself for the mind control that sure to come, but it didn't come. Bella has such a cool power. "No." I whispered.

Alex turned to me, irritate. "Fine, I'll give you time to say good-bye to your family, but I'll be back to get you. Just because you ran away doesn't mean you'll be rid of me forever." He turned and walked away.

"Okay, everyone, lets get back to the house." Carlisle said. Alice ran over to me and placed her hand across my shoulder. I don't really remember the run home. I was more focused on other things. Alex was coming back. He was probably going to kill the Cullens before getting me for helping me. I had a power to turn invisible. Maybe I could run again and turn invisible to get away. No, Alex would still hurt the Cullens. I should stay and help them.

When we got home, we all sat around the dinning table. We all know it was time. Time to hear my story.


	8. Chapter 8

Selene's Diary

2-10-10 night

"You need to know that, when Alex asked me to be a vampire, I said 'no'." I told to them. I sat at the head of the table, Carlisle to my right and Alice to my left. Esme, Jasper, Edward, Rosalie, Bella, and Emmett were all there. Jacob was with Nessie and keeping guard, in case Alex came.

I paused for a moment, not wanting to relive that painful time. Alice gave me an encouraging smile. Having seen the future, she knew what I was going to say.

"But I don't know what Alex wanted with me. He changed me anyway." I swallowed.

"Why did he choose you in the first place?" Jasper asked.

"I don't know, maybe it was because I figured out he was a vampire. I met he on a blind date, set up by a friend of mine. I think he might have controlled her, because when I asked about him later, she had no idea what I was talking about.

"Anyway, we started dating and I fell in love with him. Until..." I trailed off. "I just found out he was a vampire. He asked me if I wanted to be a vampire... be with him forever and after seeing what just saw, I was reluctant to become that..."

"But he changed you anyway?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, h-he didn't tell me anything about being a vampire. I only knew what I saw in movies and read in books. I thought I could go home and everything would be alright." I looked down, when I spoke again my voice was a whisper. "When the changing stopped I ran home... Only to find that Alex beat me to it." I buried my face in my hands. I couldn't go on anymore. But Edward went on for me.

"He killed your family." He said.

I nodded. A gasp came from Alice. "Selene, your fading."

I opened my eyes and I could only see a faint out line of myself, I was indeed fading.

"I guess I start disappearing when I want to get away from something." I muttered.

"That's why I couldn't see your future! When you go invisible, no one can see you, like your not even there."

"Your thoughts disappear, too," Edward added. "That's amazing."

"Cool, I guess." I was completely gone now. "That's nice to know."

"Um, Selene, it's a little weird not seeing you but hearing you. Can you go visible?" Emmett asked.

I focused for a moment on being visible, when everyone could see me I went on. "Alex said it was better that they were gone. Nothing to hold me back. I should focus on more important things. I tried to fight him, but with one word all the fight in me was gone and I was his little puppet.

"For a year, he kept me under control that way. I couldn't do anything to stop it. After a while, though, he slowly stopped using his ability on me and I got my mind back. First chance I had, I ran."

"Why did he let you off?" Jasper asked.

"Maybe to see if I didn't need it." I shrugged. "Or maybe to see if I'd get any skills.

"I stayed down in the south, New Mexico mainly. I visited my family's grave, once, too. I tried to keep from hunting as best as I could, I hated killing people for their blood.

"I met a couple of nomads and became friends with them. They knew I hated hunting people and told me of a coven who could help me with that. They told me about you." I smiled a little then. "I think you know what happened then."

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